If I were to write in my journal in the wee hours of the morning on November 24, 2007, it might look something like this:I'm bleary-eyed and sleep-deprived.
I'm freezing.
I'm hungry.
I've seen way too many velour jogging suits.
Enough of the shopping cart road rage already!
What is she going to do with 18 boxes of Pictionary? He woke up at the crack of dawn to battle hoards of people, only to come look at lightbulbs?
I should be filming this for future use when my kids doubt my love for them.
There's no place like home (specifically, home in bed), there's no place like home, there's no place like home. Get me outta here!!!
Other thoughts I want to share:
1. Within the first half-hour of my journey (I love how every single reality show uses that word…"it's been such an amazing journey"), two different mothers were reprimanded for neglecting their children. One left her newborn in the carseat sitting in a cart while she ran around like a wild banshee; poor baby sat there in the middle of a herd of shoppers crying, with no mom in sight. When the store employees finally found her 15 minutes later, she was all bugged that they "made a big deal" of it. Hello! The second mom left her baby in the car (did I mention it was freezing?) saying she was just going to "run in and get one thing." Really. Have you never shopped Black Friday before? Do you not know about the forever-waiting checkout lines? She got an earful from the security guard. I was thoroughly amused.
2. I almost got a free TV. Big LCD HDTV. The bagger kid put the last customer's TV in the bottom of my cart while I was busy putting in my PIN. I didn't notice until I got out to my car, put my bags in the trunk and saw a large box sitting there. I checked my receipt to make sure I hadn't been charged for it, and proceeded to wheel it back in to the cashier. The people who had been in line behind me were giving me all sorts of "Are you CRAZY??!!" looks as I explained the situation. I know I totally could have put that sucker in my trunk and driven away, but think of the poor people who got to their car and realized they didn't have a big box that they had paid hundreds of dollars for. Plus, I was really hoping the Black Friday gods would give me prosperity and protection for the remainder of my journey.
3. Speaking of reality shows and journeys, I truly feel they should make a Black Friday reality show. What people will do to save $20 is pretty incredible. AND they could make alliances and vote off the weakest link and win money-spending challenges. I made an alliance with a girl who had no eyebrows, had black lips and multiple piercings (but at least she had makeup on…she made more effort than I did). I held her DVDs in my cart (and place in line) while she ran back to check for restocked toys. No one even suspected a thing. We're going all the way, baby, we've got each other's backs.
4. I think the theme song for the reality show (frankly, I think every store should play this as soon as they open their doors) should be the William Tell Overture, more commonly known as The Lone Ranger song. Tadada, tadada, tadadadaDA! Tadada, tadada, tadadadaDA! Tadada, tadada, tadadadaDA, tadaDA, tadaDA-DA-DA.
9 comments:
PERFECT description and thoughts for such a day as Black Friday! The whole time i'm reading your post i'm thinking "this is sooo well written"! Really it was. I too made an "alliance" with some people.
Justin was saying you got an awesome deal on a tv at target. Darn, i was there and didn't think they would have any left so i didn't even try to get that tv. Good JOb!! Hope you got all you waited in the freezing cold for!!
LOVE the post!! I was one of those crazies too!! LOVE Black Friday!! I do it every year!
You really need to market that reality show!
You're brave! Being the St. Johnsian that I am, I have NEVER taken the Black Friday challenge and don't know that I ever will--I dislike shopping under the best of circumstances. Anyway, having never experienced it myself, I enjoyed your description:) Hope you got some good deals.
loved this post! i did the whole black friday thing and i guess it's a universal thing...you know...all the crazies show up at that hour :).
ps i sent that movie out to you a little while ago..just wanted to make sure you got it and that it worked. let me know :)
I have to say I have never experienced the phenom that is shopping the day after Thanksgiving, and now I at least know what I am missing. Thanks for making it sound so entertaining. I agree that it would make for good tv.
I love your post! Very funny and entertaining and you definitely should be the writer/producer for that reality show. I haven't ever done the Black Friday thing but one of these years, I think I might try it just for fun.
Lindy this had me upset, laughing, impressed (you returning the TV to its owner...they should've bought you breakfast - or your own TV for doing that) and very happy I was not participating in the madness this year. I couldn't believe there were people that left their babies! I don't think Black Friday is worth the scramble unless you have kids to buy for. Maybe I just missed all the deals when I went in the wee hours of the morning last year, but I didn't buy one single thing and went home and took a nap around 7AM. (That sounds weird) Anyhow, this was a great post, I'm glad you partnered with someone and got at least a few things you were looking for! Happy holiday shopping.
I loved reading this! And the idea about the reality show was great. I actually can picture people galloping into a store, slapping their booties, and William Tell playing in the background. What a great image. It makes me want to own my own store now, because I would totally do that!
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