For the record, let it be known that...

See, Makai, I really do love you.

...Thursday night Makai was complaining of stomach pain, as he had for the previous week. It's simply a matter of being backed up, if you know what I'm talking about—a result of his refusing to eat fruit or vegetable in any form.

Anyway, his moans and groans and foghorn-like cries continued until well past midnight; he was keeping the whole household awake, including my visiting parents. After numerous attempts to comfort/silence him, I moved him upstairs so my parents could sleep. But then I feared he would wake the baby.

Frustrated, I informed—okay, I threatened—him that if he could not keep it down, he would have to go sleep outside in the car where we couldn't hear him. (You know, kind of like my dad threatening to make us sleep outside in the woodpile with the skunks.) Satisfied that Makai would finally relax and go to sleep, I went back to bed, only to wake up to an early morning phone call from Aki (who had gone to work in Salt Lake at 4:00 AM).

Him: "Um, just so you know, I've got Makai."

Me: "What??!! What do you mean?"

Him: "Well, I drove to work this morning, and just before arriving there, I heard a little moan. It freaked me out...I turned around, and there was Makai sleeping on the back seat. He had a pillow and blanket and everything. He told me that you had gotten mad at him and said he had to sleep outside. Did you really do that?"

Me: "Kind of."

So, the Funakis had their own version of "Bring your Son to Work Day;" Makai missed school and drove around with Aki and accompanied him to jobs. Shirtless and shoeless and his bedhead at its best, I'm sure Makai's appearance made Aki's customers wonder about the stability of our family life. Luckily one of the homeowners was sympathetic to the situation and let him watch Scooby Doo and eat cereal while Dad worked in their kitchen.

When all was said and done and they arrived home, Aki admitted it had been a v e r r r y l o o o o n g day, and that he had to hand it to me for caring for Makai day in and day out. Tell me about it.

Just in case the future Makai remembers this day, and is prone to think that I was a wicked and evil [biological] mother for coldly and neglectfully banishing him to the outer realms of our driveway, I'll just point back to this blog entry to tell him how it really happened.

The moral of the story is: EAT YOUR VEGGIES